Seven questions to create clarity

When I shifted my focus to specifically help women have more satisfying romantic relationships, I did a bunch of free sessions with friends. One of them recently reached out to me to share her story about how she is now dating the love of her life thanks to our conversation. 

Her words deeply moved me, and I was so happy to be a part of her process to help her get clarity about exactly what she’s was looking for. She realized that it was more important for her man to have a great heart, not necessarily great abs. She went from feelings  incapable of loving to embracing a man and his life entirely. And all because we got her a little clarity.

So how exactly did she do it, you may be asking yourself. How did she make that big of a shift in just four months? First, she opened herself and gave herself the space to reflect on what she really wanted, and then she committed to it. 

I recently heard in an in an interview with Alison Armstrong that you know when someone is committed when they have a plan B. Someone that wants something so badly, they make sure they have more than one way to get their goal. I really love this idea, and it works in so many ways. But before we get to committing, let’s find out what we are committing to, shall we?

I have seven questions that I will ask just about every client. I’ve found that these questions give you the space and reflection you need to really see yourself so you can find what’s you really want. Grab a journal, write down these questions and give yourself at least half an hour to explore.

1. What goal am I trying to achieve?
2. Why is this important to me?
3. What does it mean if I achieve it?
4. What will my life look like if I achieve my goal?
5. How will I feel when I achieve it?
6. What is at stake if I don’t achieve it? 
7. What is one small step I can take right now to move in the direction of my goal? (Go with your gut, whatever the first answer is, go with it)

These questions get to the heart of your motivations, which is really what drives your actions.  Once you see your answers, you can reflect if that is truly what you want, and if you are taking actions that line up with the result you desire. 

It’s a refining process. Ask the questions, reflect, then check in if it is really true, refine some more.  When you feel a sense of completion or satisfaction, you have found your clarity.

This is different for everyone. In the interview with Alison Armstrong she was talking about women committed to pleasure in the bedroom. Your clarity could be about the type of relationship you want to be in. Or it could be about the impact you want to make in the world. The process is the same for any of your desires.

The next step is to commit 110%. You must go all in. Go so far into “all in” that you will get it no matter what, no matter how many plans you must execute, no matter how long it takes. Have you ever felt that committed before? 

I encourage you you to share your answers with another person that you trust. Maybe you go through the questions together. There isn’t power in being witnessed by another and speaking your desires out loud. It gives new energy and a deeper commitment. 

If you’d like me to witness your commitment, I’m here for you. Reply to this email and share with me what you are committed to,  if you would like to go through the questions with me in a complimentary 30 minute session, I’d love to offer you that gift.

And if you are a single woman desiring to go even deeper in this process to find a relationship that deeply satisfies you, then I have a special gift for you. Go here to get started with my man Magnet Bootcamp very which is a completely free way to go deeper into your desires so you can get the relationship you want.  Click here to sign up and join me:

Lots of love