It didn't even occur to me to cry.
Today's blog is coming to you early! When writer Alexandra Franzensent a challenge to write a list about what we would do if we found out we had 24 hours to live, all I could think about was love and celebration. As I wrote my list, I noticed some tears because I was feeling so much love for the people that I wanted to spend time with.
I wrote my list in a stream of consciousness. I didn't have to think about it, I just pictured what I would want. And when I read it back, it struck me that half of my list was about love.
It was Love that comes in all shapes, sizes and forms, but still, love was all over the page. I wanted to make sure I expressed to people how much love I have for them, even to the people that I only knew for a short period of time.
I started to wonder about why we wait so long to tell people that we care. Why do we wait until something bad happens to say, "I love you, you're important to me."
I don't have a good answer. Maybe we're afraid of being rejected because the other person doesn't feel the same. But does that really matter? If we feel love and we wish to express it and give it freely it does not matter what comes back. The flow of love is so pure that it does not require an exchange. If I feel love towards you, it is not conditional on whether or not you love me. I feel it, and that doesn't change if you don't feel it.
So the idea of rejection doesn't work as an excuse to not express love.
Maybe we hold back expressing ourselves because we are afraid to get hurt. Saying our true feelings is very vulnerable. It's baring our naked soul and saying this is me, see me. There is no armor to protect, you now have access to something very soft and tender and you can do great harm if you choose.
Maybe that's part of it. Vulnerability is scary. Especially for those of us when we've had our vulnerability used against us in the past. (And honestly, who hasn't?) It could be as simple as telling your best friend who you had a crush on and then she told someone who told your crush. Oh, the embarrassment! I think we all know what it's like to be completely vulnerable and someone takes advantage of the situation and it causes you great pain.
But we have also had the moments of being seen when we are completely vulnerable. The moments when the armor comes down and we allow ourselves to be really seen by another person, and then we feel truly accepted maybe for the first time ever. That moment and that feeling is worth risking being hurt. It is the feeling of deepest connection. You could almost say it is a holy moment, a miracle.
Maybe I would be willing to risk all this in my final 24 hours because how can anyone possibly hurt a dying girl? My time is limited already, so I might as well lay it all on the line! You can't hurt me anymore because I already know how this is going to end!
What would it be like if we didn't wait? What if we told one person today how we really feel? What if we did one thing that we really wanted to do, no matter what anyone else thinks? What would be your thing?
Part of Alex's challenge was to spark conversation. What would you do if you had 24 hours to live? And I'm sharing my list with you below, and I want to know what's on your list? Comment below and tell me. Or forward this email to someone and tell them how you feel.
Sending you lots of love, and I mean it.
PS. What would be on your list?
PPS. If you’re looking for a new book to read, you can order Alex's new book So This Is the End here: http://bit.ly/so-this-is-the-end
Did you find this blog post helpful? Do you want to increase the love in your life? It all starts with yourself, which is why I created a simple self love meditation. Claim yours here and get more love immediately.