Courage Over Clarity
/A few months ago, I paused these newsletters. I was healing from my own breakup and I wanted to get clear on my message.
I am feeling more ready to start writing again. And as I was sitting with this idea, this came through as something that needed to be written and sent immediately. So, I don’t know who needs to hear this today and I'm sending this for that person.
Courage, dear heart...
One of the most difficult parts of a breakup is losing clarity about what you think your future would look like.
One day, you’re planning what it will look like with this person one year, five years, fifty tears into the future.
And then, after the breakup it feels like you lose so much- your lover, your friend, your future. The future is no longer clear like you thought it was.
And to be completely truthful here, the future is never clear. Even when we think it is. The future is never a guarantee because we have no idea what will happen.
It would be more accurate to say- The illusion of clarity is gone.
And, shit, that’s scary.
Human beings hate uncertainty. There is nothing scarier than not knowing.
After a breakup, we lose clarity but we can choose courage.
The loss of clarity makes the space for you to take responsibility. It’s an invitation to you that you can accept or not. You can embrace the change and choose to have courage about facing your future. Uncertainty and all.
Courage doesn’t always feel good. Clarity feels like curling up on with hot cocoa with a warm cozy blanket. And courage feels like a giant bucket of ice water dumped on your head.
But it’s your wake up call.
You might be shivering, but now you’re awake. You can focus and choose what’s next.
Embrace courage even though it’s scary. Let go of the need for clarity. To summarize Martin Luther king jr. Take the next step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase.
Courage is one step at a time. Summon your courage. Wear it like a badge. You are now awake and taking control of your future.
No more autopilot.
Courage, dear heart.